Shattered
by Hope to dream
Summary: Zuko wasn't the one banished from the Fire Nation, but Azula. Humiliated, homeless, and scarred, she learns to face her inner demons, and possibly help save the world. AU
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:** Zuko wasn't the one banished from the fire nation, but Azula. Humiliated, homeless, and scarred, she learns to face her inner demons, and possibly help save the world. AU

**a/n: so this idea sprung in my head while I was watching old Avatar reruns and frankly, wouldn't leave my brain. I'm actually not a big fan of Azula, but figured 'eh what the heck?'**

**let me know what you guys think**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar the Last Airbender. If I did, it would be called Sokka. (Seriously, the guy is EPIC lol)**

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><p>For as long as I could remember, I had always had the entirety of my life planned down to the most intricate details.<p>

I would prove to my father that I was the most suitable heir to the throne, humiliating Zuko at every turn.

After snatching said brother's birthright I would seek out my mother just to rub it in her face that I, the _monster child_, had prevailed. I would then lock her away so she rotted in the fire nation dungeons. Showing her how it felt to be forgotten and worthless.

I would rule the Fire Nation with an iron fist, conquering the lands and destroying the avatar once and for all.

My legacy would precede me in Fire Nation history as the one who finally did it. The woman who held the entire world in the palm of her hand.

The _greatest_ ruler of all time.

Everything was laid out so perfectly.

I had the talent. The skill.

And most importantly—father's favor.

I never imagined it would all be taken from me. That the life I'd constructed together so seamlessly would erupt in flames.

My prestige.

Gone.

Family name.

Gone

Honor.

_Tarnished_.

And all because for one measly, foolish second I allowed myself to care. One fruitless, careless moment I acted without thinking.

For Zuko.

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><p><strong>a n: so this as just to see if anyones interested in me continuing this.**

**review if you want more!**

**~Hope to dream **


	2. Then

**A/n:Wow guys! I appreciate all your encouragement and advice and I've been keeping it in mind as I wrote.**

**Just as a heads up—90% of this chapter was composed of the episode _Zuko Alone_ and I attempted to only include bits and segments I felt were relevant for child Azula's development. It isn't exact, I twisted and changed some things, but the general idea is the same except told from Azula's perspective. The ending however is different as you'll soon find out. Let me know what you all think!**

**p.s-I tried to put Azula's entire childhood in this chapter so we can get to the good stuff faster so be prepared to sit a while. It's _long_.**

**p.s.s.- the entire chapter is in fragments because I couldn't include _everything_ so I apologize if any of you are annoyed with that sort of thing. It's just for this chapter **

**Disclaimer: **I don't own ATLA, I just like to play in their world (_not like that your perves!_)

**Hope you like it.**

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><p>Mom was with Zuko again.<p>

As _always_.

He'd foolishly managed to get himself bitten by a mother turtle-duck after lobbing a loaf of bread at its baby. I would have laughed at his panicked expression if mother hadn't immediately come to his aide. Her eyes were warm, the type of warm I never got to witness first-hand, as she pulled him into an embrace, gently removing the duck from his ankle.

"Stupid turtle-duck!" The young prince wailed, eyeing the creature with distaste, "Why'd it bite me?"

'_Why wouldn't it?_' I couldn't help but think sardonically.

Mother's answer was decidedly different than mine. As was everything else about her. I believed this was the reason she kept her distance from me—because I was nothing like her. I wasn't soft. Or gentle.

I didn't have the luxury of such trivialities.

_Zuko on the other hand..._

I watched enviously from the corner of my eye as he giggled, falling prey to Mother's nimble fingers as she tickled his abdomen.

"That's how mothers are Zuko." She told him, and with a playful roar began smattering his face with kisses , "_When you mess with their babies_!"

The sight of them was making my stomach churn, and I was almost relieved when Ty Lee latched onto my arm, distracting me.

Almost being the key phrase.

"Your turn Azula!" She declared cheerfully, eyes round and earnest. When she looked at me like that it was almost impossible for me to deny her, even if it meant playing another one of her bizarre circus games.

Again, the key word being _almost_.

I crossed my arms haughtily, fully intended on telling her just how dumb I found her inane flipping, when another peal of laughter jolted through my awareness. My eyes had a mind of their own, again drawn to the perfect little picture Zuko and my mother made on the opposite side of the royal gardens.

Oh yeah, they were _bonding_.

I felt frigid all over, each delighted shriek another hunk of ice adding to the already mountainous pile in my midst.

_Just what was so good about him anyway?_

He was a wimp. And a coward. And a total crybaby too.

How could she choose _him_ over _me_? I couldn't understand.

I was the true warrior. Everything a Fire Nation heir ought to be. Father favored _me_.

The last thought snapped me back to reality, and I blinked at Ty Lee and Mai who were both watching me curiously.

A smirk curled my lips.

That's right. Father favored me. I just had to show her how much better I am than Zuko. I'll make her like me best. I'll get her to look at me.

_Only_ me.

Determined, I nodded at Ty Lee who grinned, bouncing back eagerly to give me some room.

"Go Azula!" She cheered, braid flopping wildly. Mai yawned.

I ignored them, solely focused on impressing my mother with my skill. She liked feminine things like flowers and such—if I did well at this she'll surely be pleased.

My legs moved across the ground rapidly, bending to propel my body in the air. The action wasn't much different than the fire-bending drills I was accustomed to, and I manoeuvred my body into the correct position easily. Landing was the hard part.

My legs quaked from the impact, easily giving out and causing me to stumble.

_No!_

I cringed, hoping Mother didn't see that part, only to grimace when I realizedl her eyes had yet to leave my brother.

She hadn't seen me at all.

Something heavy was festering in my chest—knotting, and twisting, and coiling into a uncomfortable little mound. The sensation worsened when Ty Lee did the same flip I did, only sticking the landing expertly.

"Ta-da!" She cried, and I shoved her, taking small satisfaction in the way she pouted. It didn't last long.

Zuko and Mother had stood and were preparing to leave. The feeling in my chest was nearly suffacating, and I vaguely noticed the way Mai's usually stoic face had bloomed with color.

_Great. Another person who liked Zuko better_.

Ty Lee caught my eye and I could easily decipher the mischievousness in her grin. I returned it, though mine bordered on malicious. She may have meant it harmlessly, but I wanted to make Mai pay.

I would not allow another person to put him first. Especially someone who was supposed to be _my_ friend.

"Hey Zuzu come play with us." I said. Said boy scowled at my nick-name, before turning his head dismissively.

"No way!"

I'd counted on him saying that, ignoring Mai's frantic looks as I turned towards my mother.

With my best pleading look I asked,

"Mom can you make Zuko play with us?" Zuko scowled and I resisted the urge to stick my tongue out at him. "We need equal teams for the game we're playing."

"I do _not_ want to cart-wheel!" he protested adamantly and I cut my eyes at him in annoyance.

"You won't have to." I snapped, struggling to keep my composure. _He was so irritating!_ "And cart-wheeling isn't a game _genius_."

Mother still didn't look sold, eying me warily and I pulled out my trump-card.

"We _are_ brother and sister." I stressed, "It's important for us to spend time together. Don't _you_ think so Mom?"

She seemed torn. She suspected I was planning something, but didn't want to be accused of hampering our relationship as siblings. I knew I'd won when she closed her eyes and sighed.

"Of course darling." She forced through thinned lips.

I thought I'd be happier with my victory, but felt strangely hollow as she left us. I only did it partly to mess with Mai. The other part was to get Zuko away from her.

I felt dejected, then infuriated with myself for acknowledging such a weak emotion. I took my ire out on Mai and Zuko—crafting a game that landed them both in the turtle-duck pond. Both soaking wet, and both red as cherries.

Yet even as Zuko stalked off, and Mai yelled, and Ty Lee hooted with laughter I felt...

_Empty_.

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><p>Two months later Mother presented Zuko and I with a letter from Uncle Iroh. He and his army had broken through to Ba Sing Se and he'd sent Zuko and I gifts.<p>

Zuko received a pearl dagger from the general who'd surrendered when they burst through the outer wall. His golden eyes sparkled as he gazed at the knife, and I watched on jealously. Knowing Iroh he'd get me something disgustingly feminine like a dress or comb.

It was worse.

_A new friend_, he had written.

I held the doll between two fingers, scowling at her girly clothes and heavily made-up face.

I didn't want a doll. I wanted something cool like Zuko.

I was not just a little girl. Or a princess. I was a Fire Bender!

A _prodigy_.

But Iroh was next in line for Fire Lord after Azulon, and he didn't see me as a warrior.

Embarrassment and frustration swirled in my stomach, and I snapped cruely,

"If Uncle Iroh doesn't make it back from war, then Dad would be next in line to be Fire Lord wouldn't he?"

I knew my father would never give me something as worthless as a doll.

Mother looked scandalized.

"We don't speak that way Azula!" She reprimanded, and I felt instantly contrite at her disapproving look. "That would be terrible, I can't believe you would say something like that."

"Yeah!" Zuko agreed, jumping to her defense, "How would you like it if Lu Ten wished _our_ father died?"

I brushed him off easily enough, however _her_ words cut me deep. I couldn't help comparing the way she scolded me to Zuko. She was always more gentle with him. There were no tickles or playful roars for me, just horrified looks.

That feeling. The one that felt like it was drowning me was back again, and I clutched at the expensive fabric at my chest.

_It hurt. _

I was tired of being affected by her, and buried it. Covering and layering until I was pleasantly numb. When I was like this everything was easier, my face slipping into a practiced mask of nonchalance as I proclamed,

"I _still_ think Dad would make a far better Fire Lord than his royal, tea-loving, kookiness."

And with those words I set the doll in my hand ablaze, watching it crumble away with a sort of detached satisfaction. My mother's eyes were wide, and I reveled in the fear I saw there. She was finally _seeing_ me.

Even if it was as a monster.

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><p>Lu ten died.<p>

At first I felt guilty because I had been wishing death upon his father, but the feeling was replaced with anger at the looks Mother was sending me.

_What?_

Did she believe _I_ killed him?

Or that my words had somehow inadvertently caused his death?

I knew it wasn't my fault, but I suddenly wished it was. Just so I could rub it in her face. Show her how much of a monster I could really be.

And I'd start with her precious son Zuko.

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><p>Zuko was still playing with that wretched dagger. He kept running across the room, slashing wildly back and forth slaying 'earth-benders.'<p>

It was really wearing on my already delicate nerves.

"Would you quit it!" I growled, glowering when he pretended to die. His acting skills were atrocious, and I was tempted to show him what dying _really_ felt like. "You aren't even good."

He scowled, whirling to point the knife threateningly in my direction.

"Why don't you put an apple on your head and we'll test how good I am!" He retorted scathingly.

Dark energy crackled between us, neither backing down from the overt challenge. Ever since Lu Ten's death things have gotten tenser than usual between us, and I knew it had something to do with mother. He was feeding off of her accusatory vibes towards me.

It was fine. She couldn't hurt me anymore.

Because to hurt I had to _care_.

_But I could definitely hurt Zuko._

I forced myself to relax, loosening all my muscles and quietly exhaling. My face slipped into its customary bored expression, and I cocked a brow a my still fuming brother.

"By the way..." I drawled, purposely drawing the words out. Zuko faltered, regarded me with suspicious yet curious eyes. "Uncle Iroh is returning home."

As I knew they would, his eyes lit with happiness, his frown dropping for a wide smile. I didn't know why he liked the old coot so much, but but it was obvious he adored him.

Ha.

I could have cackled. It's what made what I was about to do even sweeter.

"Really!" He exclaimed, then in a hopeful tone, "Does that mean we won the war then?"

I scoffed, taking great enjoyment in his crest-fallen expression.

"No it doesn't." My voice was matter-of-fact as I sneered at him, "It means Uncle is a quitter _and_ a loser."

Zuko's eyes widened.

"What?" He whispered. Then seemed to shake himself, proclaiming defiantly, "Uncle Iroh is _not_ a quitter!"

He was so naive. It's what made me hate him, pity him, and envy him all at once. His determination refusal to give up amused me to no end, but it was also frustrating. I wanted to see his pain.

I decided to lay it on thicker.

"Yes he did." I contradicted calmly. Craftily. "He found out his son died and just fell apart. A _real_ general would have stayed and incinerated Ba Sing Se once and for all. Not lose the battle come home sobbing."

I'd heard my father say the same words to my mother when he found out the news. Iroh was pathetic. And so was Zuko for defending him.

"Maybe he's just sad his only child is gone forever." he murmured, echoing nearly the exact words mother had responded to father with."What's so wrong with that?"

I was speechless. It was like they shared the same brain—yet I could struggle for centuries and still be on a different wavelength.

They were connected. And I finally realized there was nothing I could do to separate them.

Or include myself.

So I would just connect to someone more like me.

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><p>"Azula! Zuko!" Mother called. She seemed uneasy as she burst into the room, her usually fluid movements stiff and frantic. "Hurry up—best clothes. Your father has requested an audience with Fire Lord Azulon."<p>

Zuko jumped up eagerly, sprinting in the direction of his chambers.

I cut my eyes at the woman dubiously.

"You mean _grandfather_?" I stressed from where I lay sprawled across settee, "He isn't exactly the all-powerful ruler he used to be."

And it was true. It was common knowledge Azulon was going senile. I'd be surprised if he even remembered who we were. Someone should put him out of his misery.

I smirked at the thought.

"In fact," I continued, watching as my mother stiffened, "_Someone_ might be taking his place soon."

Her face twisted disapprovingly, but I was so used to the expression by this point it didn't faze me. I felt smug that my words had bothered her. She hated when I spoke of father becoming Fire Lord over Iroh.

Her gaze narrowed.

"Not another _word_." She ordered fiercely.

I shrugged, smile still in tact as I made for my room.

"What's the matter with that child?" her murmured words followed me down the hall.

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><p>Father was keen on showing off our skills to grandfather. He would ask us various questions revolving around our family history and I made sure I humiliated Zuko at every turn. The foolish boy couldn't answer a single question without fumbling, and it was child's play to intercept him and broadcast my superior knowledge.<p>

Each time this happened Zuko would shoot me a dirty look, ducking his head dejectedly. Father would give _Zuko_ a dirty look, before diverting his golden eyes to me, pride shining in their depths. He nodded his head approvingly, and a tingly sensation of accomplishment would course through my veins.

Only to be washed away when Mother would turn to me with solemn eyes.

The woman gave me whiplash. _What did she want from me?_

One minute she treated me like a monster, yet when I act like one she gets _that_ look on her face.

I resolved to ignoring her, keeping my eyes trained firmly on Grandfather's withered frame. The blue flames cast shadows over his face, making his already sunken cheeks look more sickly. His gaze connected with mine, and I knew what was coming before he even opened that ancient mouth of his.

"Show me the new moves you've learned." He ordered, and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at I stood, arranging my body in proper fire-bending stance.

I didn't particularly like him much, but I knew I had to impress him if I had any chance at being taken seriously.

My body went through the familiar movements with ease. Twisting and turning. Kicking and punching. I allowed the fire to flow through me, and when my hands shot out powerful streams of heat I caught my father smile.

It was small, but it was enough for me.

I would put all my focus in those who saw me already.

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><p>Zuko was mad at me.<p>

And he was avoiding me.

I pissed me off but I couldn't for the life of me figure out why.

_Was it because I embarrassed him in front of father and grandfather_?

No. I always did that.

_Hmmm.._

Regardless I needed to find him. I had some fire-bending techniques I wanted to try.

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><p>Father was speaking with Grandfather again. He'd been doing that a lot lately, and I had a sinking suspicion it had to do with Lu Ten.<p>

Father was nothing if ambitious, and this would be the perfect opportunity to plead his case for the throne.

"Azula what are you doing?" Zuko had rounded the corner and caught me peeping into the throne room. His voice reverberated along the wide halls and I scowled, yanking him behind the curtain with me.

His eyes widened.

"What—"

I slapped a hand over the moron's mouth.

"Shhh...be quiet!" I hissed.

I could hear them speaking in low tones, and strained my head so I just make out their figures illuminated against the flames.

"Since Lu Ten has passed, Iroh's bloodline has ended," Father was saying, "He also abandoned his men at the front lines in Ba Sing se. But _I_ am here and _my_ children are alive."

Azulon was silent.

"What do you want?" he asked at last.

"Iroh's birthright." I whispered and Zuko gasped, the sound thankfully muffled by my palm.

I didn't see why he was so surprised. It was only logical Father should seek to inherit the throne. Not to mention it would make _us_ more powerful as well.

_Our father would make a much better Fire Lord._

Ozai bowed.

"Please Father." he stated, "I want you to revoke Iroh's birthright."

The flames seemed to shoot to the ceiling, swirling menacingly as Grandfather bellowed,

"You **_dare_** ask me to betray my first born after the loss of _his_ first born?" Electricity crackled through the room and ricocheted off the walls. Several servants screamed, scampering out of reach.

The elderly man's eyes were blazing, and for the first time I saw my father frightened, rearing back as if he expected a blow.

He wasn't the only one—Zuko was shaking like a leaf beneath my fingers.

I frowned, noting the similarities in their terrified expressions. I never noticed much before, but suddenly my brother resembled our father quite strongly.

_Something about that look..._

Azulon was spewing profanities, the fire surrounding his throne licking the ceiling and charring the walls. Another violent stream of lightning blasted through the room and Zuko ripped my hand from his mouth, fleeing from the room like a frightened koala-deer.

"I think Iroh has suffered enough..." His voice was low and sinister, "But you Ozai. You're punishment has merely begun."

The threat dripped from his words with deadly promise, and an uneasy feeling rose within me.

_How would he be punished? _

Azulon was certifiably insane, and the thought of the penance his scrambled mind was capable of crafting nearly sent my stomach in a fit of nausea.

It would be something outrageous and unnecessary, I was sure of it.

"Your punishment must fit your crime." Grandfather boomed, and his son's face was drained of all color, "You should learn the agony of losing a child—so I shall take away _your_ first born."

I ran.

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><p>"Azula always lies." Zuko whispered to himself as I left his room.<p>

I paused in the hall, contemplating whether or not I should correct him, but ultimately decided against it.

Let him believe what he wanted, but my conscience was clean. He was fairly warned.

* * *

><p><em>Grandfather wanted to kill Zuko.<em>

The thought swirled through my mind with vengeance, and I furiously attempted to beat down the anxiety that accompanied it.

_No_.

My heart was a loud, thundering mass of uselessness as I wandered aimlessly through the halls. Everything was hazy and out of focus as my mind continued to assault me with prods and nigglings. Constant abuse of my brother's lifeless corpse and my mother's eyes.

Those penetrating pools that would stare to straight through me. _Pleading_ with me.

I stumbled, grasping at my burning bosom.

At this rate _I_ would be as crazy as Azulon!

Dad wouldn't listen to him...would he?

_You already know the answer to that._

He, like Zuko, would do anything to appease his father.

But this wasn't real. It couldn't be.

Father was stern, and occasionally cruel—but not stupid. Killing Zuko would be _beyond_ stupid. I comforted myself with that thought, padding quietly through the corridor.

My footsteps slowed as I passed my parents' chambers.

_But just in case_.

* * *

><p>It's been four months.<p>

Four months since mother vanished without a trace.

Four months since Azulon passed away.

Four months since Father was crowned Fire Lord.

And four months since I'd made that vile promise under the cloak of night.

_"Azula, promise me..."_

_How **dare** she._

Her voice was a trigger to my wrath, and I lashed out—nearly burning Zuko's ear clean from his head. He managed to dodge at the last possible second, wavering on unsteady limbs.

I scowled.

He was holding back again. We were supposed to be sparring, but his mind seemed to be anywhere but on the fight. His from was sloppy, and his eyes constantly glazed.

My temper spiraled, my pride rearing it's head at not being taken seriously.

_Fight me dammit!_

He knew father was watching us. Yet he wasn't taking this seriously. It was like the moment Mother left us every ounce of motivation was sucked from his body.

It was _her_ fault he was at a stand-still. It was _her_ fault Father locked himself away and refused to speak with anyone. It was _her_ fault I was burdened with keeping her secret.

She acted like she loved me for once, then disappeared.

I'll make her pay. I'll become Fire Lord, find her, and throw her in the dungeons. I'll become a true monster.

_But until then... _

Zuko shrieked as his tunic caught on fire.

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><p>"We haven't been hanging out much Azula!" Ty Lee pouted as I hunkered into my desk. Her brown eyes narrowed accusingly, "Did you find new friends?"<p>

I snorted as I began arranging my pencils. Trust the acrobat to worry about such trivial matters.

"I don't have to find friends Ty Lee." I stated arrogantly, and the girl tilted her head questionably, "They find _me_."

It was Mai's turn to snort, and I shot her a dirty look as she mumbled beneath her breath.

"What was that _Grim Reaper_?" I snarled irritably, whirling in the raven-haired girl's direction.

Her eyes were blank, face wiped clean on any emotion. It kind of freaked me out how she was able to look so lifeless, not that I'd admit it to her.

"I just think it's funny..." She trailed in that raspy voice of hers, picking absently at her fingers. Her eyes flashed to mine, "Considering we're _your highness's_ only friends."

My lip curled at the veiled insult.

Mai blinked.

Ty Lee's head was whipping back and forth between us, sensitive to the animosity rolling off of both our forms in heavy waves.

"G-guys—" she attempted to lighten the atmosphere, but I was already out of my chair.

"Don't speak to me anymore." I ordered, then stalked out.

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><p>"Did you hear?" One of the guards whispered. My ears perked at his words, and I sank lower from my spot behind the rosebushes, "Prince Zuko spoke against one of Ozai's war advisors."<p>

I scowled. I had wanted to go to that meeting but Father took Zuko instead. And he had made a total fool of him.

_Serves him right._

The other guard gasped.

"Seriously?" He hissed, "About what?"

There was a brief pause in which I assumed the first guard shrugged, and his deep voice sounded troubled.

"He was challenged to an Agni Kai and the young prince accepted."

I made a face. That was just like Zuko, always jumping into things without thinking. It's what made him the family idiot.

"Why the tone?" The second guard jibed, playfully, "I'm sure Zuko will take it easy on whatever ancient geezer he's up against."

He laughed heartily but then abruptly stopped himself, and I peeked to see his comrade glowering at him.

"He's not fighting the adviser you fool!" He barked, "_Ozai's_ his opponent."

_Father?_

Numerous emotions swirled through me at lightning speed. Glee. Satisfaction. _Excitement_. Zuko had finally gone too far, and if I kept playing my role as Ozai's perfect daughter I was practically guaranteed to be crowned the next Fire Lord.

And when that day came was the day Ursa would cower at my feet.

* * *

><p>Iroh was trembling.<p>

The old, fat fool was worrying entirely too much. Zuko was Ozai's son, he wouldn't do anything _too_ terrible to him. This Agni Kai was just to put the whelp back in his place. A lesson for him to keep his mouth shut.

But as father circled, his moves calculated, his eyes fierce, I began to wonder.

"Father!" Zuko sank to his knees, eyes wide with tears. It was too pathetic to watch, and it found myself staring at the overhead lights instead.

Were those new? I could have sworn they weren't there this morning.

Hmmm...

Practically the entire Fire Nation was present, and I shifted uncomfortably as my hair sweltered at the back of my neck. Someone jostled me as they attempted to get closer and I nearly singed his arm off.

_Ugh. Peasants._

Couldn't they watch from the windows or something?

"I won't fight you!"

The exclamation snapped my eyes back to the boy in disbelief. And I wasn't the only one, the crowd was murmuring to one another, and I felt Iroh stiffen at my side.

My eyes narrowed.

_What the hell did that idiot think he was doing?_

He should know by now that showing weakness so publicly would only incur father's rath!

I was frowning so hard my face hurt, telepathically demanding him to quit this foolishness and _fight_ already.

I came here to see Zuko fight. _For real_. Not groveling like a beggar.

He was a _prince_ for Agni's sake! Where was his pride? His honor!

But as I watched him I knew he didn't have it in him. He was too softhearted to attack a family member. It was why I always went so hard on him when we sparred.

No matter how much I hurt him. Ridiculed him. Shamed him.

He never fought will his all.

_Because of Ursa._

It pissed me off.

My body was vibrating with fury. He had a chance to prove himself and show everyone he wasn't the spineless creature he pretended to be. Yet he bowed his head, and refused to do so.

_Because of Ursa._

My pulse skittered wildly, every ounce of blood I owned rushing to my head so fast it left me dizzy. I swore colorfully beneath my breath when I stumbled, and Iroh—_of all people!_—steadied me.

His eyes cut to me curiously, a knowing expression on his face that seemed to say,

'_Whats wrong with you?_'

I scowled at the look, shoving his filthy fingers away with shaky hands.

_Dammit. I hated this._

I was supposed to be enjoying myself.

_"Azula, promise me..."_

Ursa was suddenly there, grasping my chin and turning my head. I reveled in the tenderness of her touch, and hated myself for it, but just couldn't help myself. My mother's memory was haunting me, her form vivid under the bright lights. Warm arms curled around me, and I could have sworn she was really there with me when her familiar scent invaded my nostrils.

But that was impossible—I was going insane.

That wasn't Ursa. It was my sick, twisted mind playing tricks on me.

_But it felt so real._

Her mouth bent towards my ear,

_"Look."_

My eyes widened.

I saw it in the way he bent his foot, the positioning of his arm. He was planning to brand him.

_No_.

The word shot through my awareness with defiance, and I was moving before I could even register why.

_"Azula promise me you will..."_

He couldn't do that. Zuko was _mine_. I was supposed to beat him. He was my rival. He was the last shred of my humanity. And if he was gone, so was it. He's what kept me grounded. Focused. _Sane_.

"Azula!"

I felt blistering pain across my face—flashing lights—then darkness.

* * *

><p><strong>an: I'm actually not sure if all of that made sense—but that's Azula's mind for you. Did I keep her in character? Does my writing suck? Let me know what you think in a review.**

**Till next time,**

**~Hope to dream**


	3. Now

**A/n: *scratches head* Yeah it's been a while, sorry guys. I'm a full-time college student so I'm left with little free time. I'll try to make the next update quicker. **

**On on a positive note...**

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**Disclaimer: I don't own ATLA. If I did Toph would have become queen of the world (Ha, ha kidding...mostly)**

**Enjoy my lovelies!**

**(For those who have already read this chapter I apologize. I was trying to edit it and ended up deleting the whole thing by accident. Yeah—I'm scatterbrained like that. Sorry!)**

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><p>Ugh.<p>

Ty Lee was fraternizing with crew again.

I watched with an disturbed sort of fascination as a man's meaty hand became much too acquainted with the acrobat's rear, rubbing small circles that caused the the braided girl to giggle coyly and bat her lashes.

I could feel my entire face contorting at the indecent picture they made; sprawled in the corner of the crew's courters', fused at the lips and lewd suction noises filling the room. I'm certain another in my place might have felt embarrassed by witnessing such intimacy, but I was so used to the girl's scandalous antics by now they no longer fazed me.

In fact, I was _annoyed_. If not a bit repulsed.

_How many times have I told her to quit distracting my crew?_

Far too many to be acceptable that's for sure.

_Perhaps forcing her to walk the plank will finally get it through her thick skull._

I shook my head immediately at the thought.

_No. She would definitely enjoy that._

A rather rambunctious moan cut through the room, effectively pulling me from my thoughts and reminding me of the hormonal couple sucking face on my ship.

_Like hell._

My brow began to tick when I noticed that the deplorable hand's finger's had flexed, and I was already marching in their direction when a thumb slipped beneath the waistband of her tights.

"Ty Lee." My voice was curt as both parties turned to stare at me—Ty Lee questioning, and her counterpart in horror.

"Princess I can explain!" He spluttered, yet I barely spared him more than a cursory glance. He was tan, and probably one of the youngest men aboard, but still too old for Ty Lee.

"Get out." I ordered and he scrambled to his feet, casting one last longing look to my friend before hurriedly vacating the room.

Ty Lee pouted as she watched him go, turning to me with furrowed brows.

"Zula!" She whined, large eyes shining with disappointment, "He was really cute! And I _finally_ managed to convince him to kiss me and then you come and sabotage me again."

She released a huff, flopping onto her back and not seeming to mind the manly filth surrounding her. Fire Nation soldiers really were quite an unsanitary bunch—the stench was nearly unbearable.

Her brow creased worriedly.

"Now he'll probably be too scared to approach me again."

I rolled my eyes.

"Good." I snapped—Agni, what that _moldy underwear_ I smelled?—"Then maybe you'll actually take me seriously when I tell you to stay away from my crew."

A roach skittered past my boots.

I'm officially ordering them to toss all their belongings overboard.

I turned on my heal and stalked away from the smelly barracks, savoring the fresh breeze that invaded my nostrils as I emerged on the ship's deck. It was spotless, as per usual, a pair of soldiers busily mopping the floors and scrubbing the walls with vigor.

They stood immediately upon catching sight of me, saluting respectfully.

"Princess." They acknowledged in unison.

I ignored them, striding to the front of the ship to gaze out at the water. The steady rocking of the hull still made my stomach queasy even after all this time, but I refused to show even the slightest weakness in front of my men. I'd swallow my own bile a thousand times over if necessary.

It was nearing nightfall, the sun low in the sky and wind cool against my heated skin. I could feel salt in the air. It dried out my hair and burned my lungs, but I relished in the feeling.

It reminded me why I was here. That my reality was a constant grating force that consumed me from all sides.

There was no going back.

_Catch the Avatar?_

Father must have thought me a fool to even suggest that as my punishment.

Did he forget I was a prodigy—that I _knew_ that no one had heard a whisper of the avatar for over a hundred years?

I knew I was an exile, and that this whole sham to reclaim my 'honor' was Ozai's way of humiliating me. Everyone knew Zuko was already a disgrace to the royal line, but I—_I_ was supposed to be the one that kept up his superior image.

He believed I had betrayed him when I took his punishment for Zuko, embarrassed him and undermined his authority in front of the entire Fire Nation.

And in a way I had, I suppose.

I resisted the urge to cringe as I recalled the excruciating pain that had crippled my entire body with intensity as his scalding knuckles glided across my cheekbone. The startled look in his golden eyes. Zuko screaming and clutching my limp body to his chest.

It all seemed like yesterday, yet nearly four years had passed.

My hand lifted as if to touch my marred cheek, then abruptly lowered.

I could hear the light patter of Ty Lee's footsteps trailing after me, and didn't bother hiding my scowl as I turned to face her.

"What Ty Lee?" I snarled.

She didn't react to my harsh tone. She never did, simply meeting my eyes.

"Loosen up a little Azula." She advised seriously, "It'll do you no good to be so uptight and serious all the time."

I bared my teeth at her.

"And you need to _tighten_ up." I returned scathingly,"I doubt it's appropriate for a nobleman's daughter to be so loose."

She didn't bat an eye at my words, not bothering to take offense. It was why we managed to remain friends for so long, she understood when and when not to take me seriously despite my cruelty.

"I'm worried about you Zula." She murmured, "You're aura's been all over the place lately—" she glanced around before leaning in to ask lowly "—are you having nightmares again? I thought they went away. "

I flinched.

Thankfully she was the only one who knew about the dreams that plagued me since we shared the only available suite on the ship. They usually involved Ursa or some form of her, but as of late I've begun to see a bearded man in Fire Nation robes. His mouth would be moving but I couldn't here a word, and he always seemed so frustrated with me—shaking his head and pointing wildly.

"Not nightmares." I admitted and her brown eyes widened in question.

No. They weren't nightmares, more like visions.

But I couldn't tell her that.

We both knew I wasn't the most emotionally stable individual, I still saw manifestations of my mother from time to time, and for all I knew this man could be another being concocted from my demented mind.

So I lied.

"They were...sex dreams."

My voice seemed to carry thunderously across the deck, and several soldiers turned to stare in surprise.

_Shit_.

Ty Lee squealed.

"At last!" She declared, flinging her arms around me. Fire erupted from my fingertips, but she either didn't care or didn't notice, "And to think this whole time I thought you were asexual or something."

_Asexual?_

I regarded the girl with offense. Just because I didn't chase after every man with a pulse didn't mean I was _asexual_. I just had standards.

Besides...

"I don't have time to deal with asinine things such as men." I sniped, and she pulled back to frown at me. "I have bigger, much more prominent things to occupy my time, such as figuring out a way to overthrow my father."

Her frown deepened.

"I thought you had gotten over that." She murmured, and I glowered, not that she acknowledged it, "Why not just live a peaceful life away from the Fire Nation?"

Of course she would spout such nonsense. It was why she was here with me in the first place. She was tired of the structured environment of the Fire Nation and this was her way out.

Not that I could blame her. She was kind and peaceful at nature.

I was not.

I craved power. _Control_. And most of all—

"I _will_ exact vengeance on my mother." I hissed, lowering my voice menacingly, "That woman took everything from me."

My dignity. My title. My _sanity_.

Ty Lee's eyes shined with sympathy, and I wrenched violently from her grasp, thrusting an enflamed fist threateningly between us.

"Don't look at me like that!" I spat, "I don't need your pity—I _will_ find her."

"But Azula." She protested softly, "No one's heard from or seen your mother in four years. Zuko's even given up searching for her! She's probably de—"

"She's alive!" I insisted vehemently. She was. I could _feel_ her. "She's out there somewhere. And when I find her she _will_ pay."

I stormed past her in a whirl of flames, gaining only menial satisfaction in the way the the men scrambled out of my path.

Ty Lee didn't understand. No one did. But that didn't matter. I always got what I wanted in the end.

Little did I know my life would soon be taking a major detour.

* * *

><p>"<em>Does it hurt?"<br>_

_I glared at Zuko with my eye that wasn't swathed in bandages._

_His answering look was sheepish, and he ran an awkward hand through his hair._

_"Yeah...stupid question." He cleared his throat, "Do you want me to get you anything? Water? New bandages. Fluff your pillows? Food—"_

_My voice was raspy, and my throat hurt, but I snarled the words anyway._

_"I _want_ you to go away!"_

_I didn't know what his problem was, but he'd been hovering over me ever since I awoke a week ago—insisting he helped take care of me despite having my own personal nurse. During this time he would keep me company and chatter about inane things like we were old friends or something ludicrous like that._

_It really was quite irritating, and I'd had enough of his mothering._

_He reared back as if I had struck him, golden eyes wide, before lowering to his knees. His entire form was dejected,shoulders hunched, and hands trembling in his lap. When his gaze returned to mine a jolt ran through me, and I could only stare numbly as he wiped roughly at his eyes._

_"Sorry, I must be bothering you." his voice sounded shaky and muffled beneath his sleeve. He stood abruptly, nearly tipping the chair over as he fled from my bedside and out the door._

_Somehow, the action managed to make the agony of my body worsen, and I groaned when a pang shot through my chest._

Damn you Zuko. Damn you to hell.

_"He blames himself you know."_

_Iroh was in the doorway, arms crossed as he observed me. I scowled at his words._

_"Well tell him to stop." I hissed, cringing as the movement caused my wound to twist. "It's weird and annoying."_

_I didn't need anyone's pity. _Especially_ Zuko's._

_Iroh sighed, striding inside and taking Zuko's former place at my bedside._

_"Just allow him to take care of you Azula." He insisted earnestly, "You saved him from this very fate, and he wants to make it as easy as possible on you."_

_I rolled my good eye._

What was with these people? Did they really believe me that noble?

_Well time to give them a reality check._

_"I didn't _intend_ save him." I emphasized, voice hard and steely. "It was a momentary lapse of sanity that I wish I could take back. He _deserved_ to be burned for that pathetic display." My eye narrowed. "In fact, tell him the next time he shows his face I'll brand him myself."_

_Iroh's stare was penetrating, and I shifted uneasily as it seemed to go straight through me—beneath my skin, and muscles, and bones into my very soul. I could hear the birds chirping just outside my window, and itched to set them ablaze just to have something to distract me from his abysmal eyes._

_"What?" I demanded when the silence grew to be too much for my frayed nerves, "Why are you looking at me like that? You know me. You know what to expect!"_

_He gave a wry smile._

_"Do I?"_

_I glowered, turning my back to the old nuisance._

_"I have no time for your foolish riddles." I snapped into my pillow._

_Iroh just shrugged, rising from the chair with more grace than I thought possible for his portly stature._

_"Azula, there is more in you than you know." he whispered cryptically._

"Princess, you have a letter."

The memories evaporated like smoke, and I blinked to see a guard standing before me. He was eying me warily, a single envelope extended towards me.

I frowned, while Ty Lee gasped excitedly.

"And this couldn't have waited until _after_ breakfast?" I quipped, gesturing to the meal of fruit and ham spread out before us.

The guard fidgeted.

"But my lady—it's from Lord Iroh and your brother!" he insisted.

"Zuko and Iroh?" Ty Lee echoed, snatching it from the startled man's hands. His eyes snapped to mine helplessly and I waved him off. He bowed, leaving as fast as he'd come.

I watched Ty Lee's large eyes scan the page eagerly, before setting it down to grin at me. I didn't return it.

"They've sent you more money." She indulged, before sighing dreamily, "Wow. They take such good care of you."

I bristled, plucking the notes right out of her hands—

And setting them on fire.

"Azula!"

"I don't need their pity." I growled, my insides filling with satisfaction as ash slithered between my fingers.

"Guard!" I hollered, and the same man from before stood before me. I gestured to the table, ordering, "Clean this up."

"Yes Princess." he agreed readily and I stood, stalking towards the ship's railing. I didn't react to Ty Lee's presence occupying my side a moment later. It was inevitable she'd follow me.

"Azula," she began softly, "Why won't you let your brother and uncle help you? Agni knows it'll only make things easier for us."

I cut my eyes at her.

"Don't tell me you've developed a crush on my brother too." I drawled acerbically. I knew the only reason I ever heard from Mai anymore was because of Zuko.

Not that I even bothered to read her letters.

The girl's eyes widened considerably as she sent me an insulted look.

"Of _course_ not!" She proclaimed adamantly, and I had to hide my smirk behind my hand at her scandalized expression. "Zuko's attractive and all, but he's totally not my type. Besides, I was only wondering since Iroh was the one who gave you this ship in the first place."

I exhaled, watching as two birds circled one another a distance off.

"Yeah." I huffed, my breath turning to frost. We were nearing the poles, and it was far too frigid for my taste. As a fire bender I was naturally repelled by all things cold.

The ship rocked unsettlingly, and I gritted my teeth as it troubled my half-full stomach.

Ty Lee was right or course. Iroh _had_ given me the ship, as well as all the soldiers to go with it. Ozai was planning to cast me out with nothing more than the clothes on my back, but when I turned to leave through the gates Iroh and Zuko were both there.

"_We wanted to join you," Zuko began uncertainly, "But Father would never allow me to leave and we knew you wouldn't let uncle so..."_

_He stared at a spot just to my right, and I slowly turned to see what he was looking at._

_And was left completely stunned._

_I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything, simply bobbing my head robotically before walking off._

_"We'll be looking out for you Azula!" he called after me. My entire body stiffened at the words. "I promise!"_

And he had kept his promise, to my immense chagrin.

He'd gone from my rival to an overprotective nimrod, and it was slowly driving me insane. And Iroh wasn't must better. He kept writing that same cryptic statement over and over again.

_Remember Azula, you are more than you know_.

My lips pursed.

The old coot was going senile.

Ty Lee began humming, her delicate chin resting in her hands as she leaned against the railing. She had appeared on the ship right before departure, claiming she was running away from home and traveling the world with me.

I never questioned her decision, it seemed to oddly suite her. She did have quite a rebellious streak.

We sat staring out at the water for hours, watching as the glaciers in the distance slowly closed in on us, the icy temperature freezing us to the bones. At one point I commanded a soldier to fetch us both blankets, and we huddled gratefully in their warmth.

That's when I saw _it_.

It illuminated the entire sky in a shimmering blue light before ceasing entirely—winking out of existence like an extinguished flame.

Ty Lee immediately turned to me.

"Did you just?"

I nodded at her unfinished question, screaming up at the soldier manning the the wheel.

"Full-speed ahead in that direction!" I ordered urgently.

I had no idea how I knew. I just did.

_The Avatar had returned._

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><p><strong>an: Did you like it? Was it good? Bad? Did I keep everyone in character? Let me know what you all think!**

**next chapter is when Azula and Sokka see each other for the first time so review, review, review!**

**oh, and before I forget the quote "you are more than you know" is credited to Benjimen Spock I believe. **

**Till next time,**

**God bless!**

**~Hope to dream**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/n: yes I know this was long overdue and I apologize immensely. Thank you to all who have favorited and reviewed this story so far. You're all awesome and are getting virtual cookies! **

**Disclaimer: me no own ATLA, if I did Ty Lee would get more screentime. Enjoy!**

***p.s. to those who have already read this chapter I apologize, I accidentally deleted it while trying to fix some formatting & spelling mistakes**

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><p><em>Relax<em>.

_In. Out. In. Out._

_Slower._

_My body loosened from its rigid stance, and I nearly sagged against the marble wall at my back. Nearly. I could feel the servants casting me pitying looks from the the corners of their eyes, but steadfastly ignored them._

_I had more important things to worry about._

Like Ozai's wrath.

_When a guard had entered my chambers informing me that Father requested to see me I knew the time had come when I would pay penance for my rash behavior. The maids had changed my bandages and helped me dress, then I was left alone to await judgement._

_My mind was a frenzy of escape routes and possible outcomes. I knew the palace like the back of my hand, and if any situation should arise that required refuge I was confident in my ability to elude effectively._

_The throne room's doors opened slowly, condemningly , and I peered inside with shrewd eyes._

_Father's voice boomed from the darkness._

_"Come in...Azula."_

_I slowly strode into the room, eying the form of the Fire Lord warily. Blue flames encased his throne like large, luminous wings, billowing softly in the stillness. His crown gleamed a malevolent black in the sparse lighting, majority of his features cast in shadows._

_I could feel him staring at me, and respectively dropped to one knee, facing him with my good eye._

_The bandages still covered my left eye, as it was sensitive to light and temperature, and as he leaned forward I caught the flash of a curled lip._

_"Look at you." He spat in disgust, timber low and mocking, "You look absolutely _pitiful_."_

_My face contorted in anger, but I held my tongue, silently seething. It would do little good for me to mouth off. And apologizing was out of the question. So I settled for glowering at the ground, ignoring the liquid heat pulsing through my veins._

_"You knew what I was planning." He was impressed, I could hear it in the lilt of his deep voice. But then it hardened and crumbled away, leaving behind confusion and ire. "And yet you _still_ intervened."_

_My eyes darted to his, and he exhaled angrily. Steam erupted from his nostrils in heavy streams, bloating around his head in stormy promise._

_"Why Azula?" He demanded, his fingers dug into the golden armrests of his throne, "You've ruined _every_thing! "_

_I cast my eyes away._

_I had nothing to say. I still couldn't comprehend my actions for myself._

_Why did I do it?_

_Because _Ursa_ told me to?_

_Ozai sighed, seeming to regain his composure._

_"Regardless the reason," He waved a dismissive hand and the smoke surrounding him dissipated. "Interfering with an Agni Kai is punishable with a life sentence in the Fire Nation prisons."_

_I tensed. _So I was going to prison?

_"But you aren't the only one who needs to be punished." he mused, "Zuko was the one who began all of this. So I will banish you and keep him here. Reminding him everyday that he is to blame for your fate."_

_His face twisted menacingly._

_"Guilt is the best punisher after all. It is like a cancer that will torture and consume you until there is nothing left."_

_His lips pulled into a smirk, golden eyes gleaming down on me._

_"And when that happens my daughter—when Zuko breaks—you may return."_

_My stomach churned despairingly at his words. My entire body stiffening with newfound revelation._

_And that's when I realized it._

_That's when the tumblers in my brain clicked into place and pieced everything together. Even though Father favored me—even though I was the better strategist, warrior, and bender—he still saw me as inferior to Zuko._

_So much so, that he refused to even dignify me with my own punishment. I was just a means to destroy my brother._

_We weren't equals in his eyes. Because I was a girl._

_They say the truth hurts, but I was far beyond caring._

_Because I wasn't interested in Ozai's plans. He wanted to use and manipulate me as he saw fit. Like a damn fiddle._

_But I was no ones lackey. Not even his._

_I would take control of the world on my own terms, without him._

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><p>I peered at my reflection in the mirror, scowling at the marred girl staring back at me. Her golden eyes were narrowed contemptuously, her thin lips pursed in disdain. She was missing an eyebrow, causing her expression to appear off-balance and strange. The armor she bore did nothing to compensate for her hideous deformity, merely causing her to look more severe and menacing.<p>

_Good_.

I wanted to be feared.

There was a sharp knock at the door and I turned my back on her, swiftly gathering my dark hair in a high bun.

"Zula?" Ty Lee's muffled voice drifted from the other side, and when she received no response the acrobat herself slipped into the room.

I cut my eyes at the pink-clad brunette.

"Did I give you permission to enter?" I demanded dryly, securing my hair with a leather band.

She rolled her large eyes.

"It's my room too!" She huffed, not mentioning the glaring point that it was only because _I_ allowed it. "Besides, isn't this exciting?"

Brown eyes glittered with said emotion as she cartwheeled across the floor, landing on my bed with neatly crossed legs.

"I mean the _Avatar_ has returned." A giant grin split her face as she bounced giddily. "You could make history Azula!"

I grunted, expertly strapping my sword into it's holster at my hip.

"We've yet to discover if the phenomenon we witnessed yesterday was truly the Avatar." I dismissed, though my own chest swelled with anticipation despite my words. "It could very well be a false alarm."

Ty Lee merely giggled, ceasing her obnoxious bouncing to give me a knowing look.

"Oh puh-_lease_." She scoffed, pointing an accusing finger in my direction, "I know you Azula, and I know you wouldn't even be wasting your time on this if you didn't believe it were at least _possible_."

I eyed her finger with a raised brow.

"You might want to remove that before I do it for you." I advised, fire flickering warningly from my fingertips, but we both knew it was an empty threat.

Well, _mostly_ anyway. I still didn't like people putting their fingers in my face.

The circus-girl snorted, standing gracefully to gaze into my mirror. She fiddled absentmindedly with her thick braid, running her fingers over it and biting her lip before meeting the eyes of my reflection.

"Do you think he'll be handsome?" She mused, and I scowled at the familiar spark in those amber globes.

Crossing my arms, I came to stand stoically beside her. Our appearances were like night and day, she—the vibrant beauty, and I—the scarred warrior.

"Don't even _think_ about it." I quipped.

She adopted an innocent expression I didn't trust in the least.

"What?" She implored with false cluelessness.

My eyes narrowed to tiny slits.

"You know _exactly_ what." I hissed, "So don't get any ideas, the avatar belongs to _me_."

She released a long, drawn-out sigh, to my immense annoyance, but nodded in reluctant acceptance.

"Fine." She huffed, adding a pouty, 'stingy' that I ignored.

She continued to sulk for several minutes after that, grumbling and tapping her foot restlessly while I struggled with the violent urge to roast her to a crisp. When I thought I'd reached my breaking point there was an urgent rap against the door.

"What is it?" I demanded sharply, adding a pointed, "And it _better_ be good."

I was not in the mood to be trifled with.

The anxious voice of a soldier filled the room.

"P-princess, a signal f-flare was spotted near the S-Southern Water Tribe." He sputtered, then seemed to realize how pathetic he sounded and cleared his throat, adding more firmly,"What are your orders?"

My mind was practically doing somersaults, warming from the inside out and causing steam to escape from my nose and mouth.

_A signal flare huh?_

I felt my lips curl into a feral smile, previous irritation evaporating like smoke. Ty-Lee shot me a wide-eyed glance, unspoken words passing between us.

"Full-steam ahead."

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><p><em>"Please come out Zula." Ty Lee's pleading voice cut through the dark like a knife, "It's not that bad."<em>

_My chest constricted painfully, and before I knew it I was marching towards the door and flinging it open. The other girl jumped, startled by my abrupt appearance._

_"Not that bad?" I echoed, my voice dipping sinisterly. My blood boiled as my voice rose hysterically."__Not. That._ Bad_."_

_I gestured to my face, laughing humourlessly._

_"Are you _blind_? Look at me! I've been branded Ty Lee. I'm a freak!"_

_Ty Lee immediately began to protest._

_"But you're still pretty!" She insisted, brown eyes wide. "And no burn or mark could ever change that!"_

_Her voice was so sure. So honest. Almost as if she really believed it._

_I couldn't even look at her._

_"You're wrong." I hissed. "I saw everyone's faces when the nurse removed it. It's hideous!" _

_She frowned._

_"But—"_

_"But that's okay," I intercepted, not willing to listen to anymore of acts of pity, "That's not what matters to me."_

_And from then on it didn't._

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><p>The ship quaked as it met the frosty shore of the Southern Water Tribe, my entire body vibrating at the collision and nearly knocking me off my feet. Ty Lee squawked as she was nearly thrown overboard, balancing precariously on the tip of her foot. I shot the soldier at the helm a dirty look he trembled at, apologizing profusely.<p>

"Idiot!" I spat, eying him with contempt, "Is it really _that_ hard to stop the damn thing before we hit land?"

"I apologize princess!" He groveled, practically jumping to his knees. "It's just sometimes when it's ice you can't quite—"

He shrieked as a stream of fire nearly took his nose, leaving his armor singed.

"If it happens again I'm feeding you to the sharks." I snarled, "Is that clear?"

He scrambled to his feet, bowing numerous times.

"Absolutely!" He garbled, "Of course. _Anything_ for you Princess. Your highness. Oh great Azula, daughter of the mighty Ozai. Granddaughter of—"

My hands erupted in flames, ceasing his senseless babble.

"Just **_go!_**" I roared and he bolted like a frightened badger-rabbit.

_Imbecile_.

I heard Ty Lee giggle at his hasty retreat and I couldn't help the smirk that graced my lips. She was always amused by such displays.

"Harsh much?" She teased, eyes glinting, "You practically made the poor man pee his pants."

I snorted.

"Would you rather take an frigid afternoon dip instead?"

Her responding laugh caught the attention of several loitering soldiers, each eying her with varying degrees of amusement and longing. I rolled my eyes at their blatant gawking.

_Men_.

"Lower the gangway." I ordered and a few ran off obediently to do as I commanded. I quirked my brow challengingly at those remaining and they immediately set off in different directions.

_Much better._

The frosty wind whipped mercilessly against my cheeks, but I didn't mind, it cooled and slowed my rapidly thumping heart.

I was possibly moments away from encountering the Avatar.

_And then Ozai would be thrown off the throne and Ursa would be at my mercy._

The thought empowered me, and I slipped my helmet on my head, only to catch Ty Lee's look of distaste.

"What?" I demanded gruffly.

She sighed.

"Must you really insist on dressing like a man?" She murmured.

My scowl was instant.

"I'm not dressing like a man." I seethed, feeling my blood beginning to simmer. _Was she really starting this now?_ "I'm dressing like a _warrior_."

She flipped her hair in exasperation.

"And you can still do so without stifling your femininity." She countered, then gestured at herself. "Just look at me!"

I scanned her frilly, pink and red attire with raised brows.

_Yeah, I don't think so._

She caught my dubious look and backtracked, giving a sheepish smile.

"Okay, so bad example." She admitted, "But _still_."

I was done talking about it by this point, straightening my helmet and adjusting my armor.

"At least let your hair down!" She persisted and I rolled my eyes, tugging on the leather strap just to get her to shut the hell up.

When the gangway lowered I caught my first glimpse of the land housing the avatar—and it was pitiful.

The entire village consisted of women and children, all huddled together and watching us with wide, fearful eyes. Tents decorated the otherwise bare landscape, practically screaming poverty.

_Was this really where the Avatar was staying?_

I didn't bother hiding my disgust as I made my way down, flanked on either side by Ty-lee and Fire Nation Soldiers.

That's when a savage yell cut through the air, and I couldn't contain my surprise as a blue and grey blur came barreling towards me.

"What the hell?" the words were out of my mouth before I could stop them, muscles coiling in preparation.

_Were they suicidal?_

Because that was the only way I could fathom a single individual attacking an entire Fire Nation fleet on their own.

When they got within range I swept their feet out from under them, watching as they shrieked and tumbled back into the snow in an ungrateful heap.

Pitiful.

"Sokka!" A girl around my age sprinted toward him, seeming to forget about us as she collapsed beside the boy.

_Girlfriend perhaps?_

I watched as she leaned over to say something to him, and when he didn't respond began slapping him across the face repeatedly.

_Or not._

When the boy finally groaned and sat up I was able to get a better look at him. Half his face was smeared with what appeared to be war paint, the other half revealing smooth, hairless brown skin. He appeared to be on the scrawny side, in the mist of puberty, even with the thick parka he adorned, and not very tall. All in all he wasn't an impressive sight, and I was quick to dismiss him.

Ty Lee however, was a different story.

"He's cute!" She whispered, adding conspiringly "I like his pony-tail."

_Seriously?_

"He's insane." I retorted, but that didn't deter her in the least.

"Can I talk to him?" She asked excitedly, "I'm sure I can get him to tell me where the Avatar is."

She turned her earnest eyes on me and I groaned inwardly. _What did I have to lose?_

_I could always beat it out of them if they didn't comply._

"Fine." I sighed, and she squealed. "Just make it quick. This place gives me chills."

_Pun intended._

She saluted, causing me to grimace at her goofy expression.

"Yes ma'am!"

And with those words she flipped down the gangplank, landing in front if the startled pair who watched her with distrustful gazes.

"Are you sure this is a good idea Princess?" One the soldiers murmured.

"Yeah." Another one agreed adamantly, "The savages could hurt Lady Ty Lee!"

I didn't deign those idiotic concerns with a response. They obviously didn't realize that 'Lady Ty Lee' was in fact a skilled fighter and is capable to taking care of herself.

I watched with interest as she approached, grinning broadly as the boy brandished his sword threateningly in her direction. Several soldiers stepped forward and I stopped them with an outstretched arm, ignoring their confused looks.

Ty Lee conversed with the peasants for an extended amount of time, before finally exhaling and and cartwheeling back to my side.

"Well?" I demanded.

She giggled, face taking on a dreamy quality.

"He's cuter up close." She divulged, "Especially when he's angry."

I resisted the urge to face-palm or something equally as undignified.

"Ty Lee. Focus ." I hissed, and the look was gone, replaced with one of disappointment.

"They claim they don't know what I'm talking about." She sighed, "But I read their auras and they seemed really anxious."

_So they were lying._

"I'll handle this." I stated and set my gaze on the pair, watching in amusement as the boy peasant rose to his feet, shielding the girl from my view as I approached.

His blue eyes resembled the very ice surrounding us, hard and cold, yet glowing and bright. I stopped just a few feet shy of him, gold clashing with blue in a battle of wills so strong it was nearly a physical force. I'd never felt anything like it—it was so _alive_—crackling in the space between us like fireworks.

Something about him. I couldn't quite place my finger on it, but it was there.

"Where is the Avatar?" My voice was like a whip, slashing the connection apart by the seams and dunking us both back to reality.

He seemed to feel it too, blinking rapidly before glowering at me.

The voice that answered was deeper than I expected, and laced with defiance.

"Like I already told your freaky friend," he snarled, jaw clenching, "The Avatar disappeared a hundred years ago. How the hell would we know where he was?"

But his eyes were shifty, as if searching for something. Or some_one_.

_So that's how he wanted to play._

"Really?" Fire shot from my fingertips and I watched in satisfaction as fear gripped his expression like an iron vice. "Well then perhaps your screams can lure him out of hiding."

I advanced upon him like a lioness stalking her prey, excitement filling my being when he turned, snatching the girl's hand and running in the opposite direction of the village into the icy wasteland.

I looked to my soldiers expectantly.

"Guard the village." I instructed, before meeting Ty Lee's gaze. She seemed to understand, bounding to my side.

"The peasants want to play tag with us." I stated, smirking mischievously.

She giggled.

"Too bad we're the queens of that game."

And they were about figure that out the hard way

* * *

><p><strong>an: and as you can see things are already deviating from the original plot. Please let me know what you all think in a review. Sadly, I am not a minders der. The quote that Ozai spoke about guilt is credited to Dave Grohl**

**see you next time!**


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